I want to write

and I feel as though I have so much to say, yet when I look at this page I get nervous and anxious and cannot put my thoughts together to form a lot of sentences.

Why hello blog...my name is Kristen, nice to finally see you again...

Wow! Two months have flown by and I have not had a chance to write anything! Is it bad that I now have more free time that I am back at work than before I was at work. It's just impossible to have stuff to do for a full 8 hours a day here so here I am blogging instead of working. Tsk, tsk...

But alas, I cannot believe that two months have flown by since the birth of our beautiful baby girl, Airlie Mae Bechtel. It has been a crazy two months indeed. Before having her I had this perfect picture of what life would be like with her. I would have my normal routine everyday of get up, take care of the baby, go to the gym or walk the loop, possibly go to Target, put baby to bed, repeat. Oh, wow, was I in for a surprise. I was totally taken aback by just how much time a baby consumes and how much energy you put into simply feeding and changing the child. I must admit that coming to the realization that my perfect little life with Wes was turned upside down and inside out was not easy. I did not like the fact that I was not in control of anything in my life and had a super hard time adjusting. Looking back on it I feel very silly for letting laundry, dinner plans, yearning for time with friends and a drink bother me. I have now adjusted to having this little bundle of joy in my life and feel amazingly lucky to call her father my husband. Speaking of him, wow, what can I say, I love Wes more now that he is Airlie's father than I thought possible. Seeing him with her, the way he looks at her, the way he talks to her, the way he takes care of her so precautiously, the way he tells me everyday how much he misses us when he's at work, the way he has unselfishly started working overtime to help us pay off some debt we have accrued, the way he is just a marvelous person in general makes me so unbelievably happy to be journeying through parenthood with him. Thank you God.

Onto other things, such as Airlie. Wow do two months make a huge difference in a baby's life! She is now only waking up once or sometimes twice at night and napping for about an hour at a time through the day. She is also eating well! We had her two month check up yesterday and she has grown 1.5 inches and weighs almost 13 lbs! She's a little chunky thing because her Mama feeds her well. The pediatrician told us she is advanced developmentally and that makes me so happy. It's so fun to interact with her. She has just recently realized she has a tongue and that she can make different noises. We spend a lot of time coaxing her into using these noises. She likes her Daddy more than me and talks and flirts with him a lot more. It's so fun to watch. She is now able to see her mobile on her swing and loves the ceiling fan. We call the ceiling fan her adult mobile. Although I have truly embraced being a Mom I must admit that at first I was not so sure of this role. I came to realize that I was a lot more selfish and routine than I had thought and I became super anxious because of this. Lucky for me my Mom and Wes were here to support me and help me through those first two weeks. This whole parenting thing is one wild ride, but I'm glad to say it is mostly a fun and rewarding one, minus the sleep deprivation! More to come...